Why I am like Captain Ahab

My Current Obsessions

• Greatness (I know, the arrogance)
  
  • I want to be an amazing something
    
    • 1) A great inventor
    
    
    • 2) A great scientist/mathematician
    
    
    • 3) A brilliant business person come philanthropist
    
    
    • 4) World class at something difficult


• Peace of Mind
  
  • I want that deep peaceful and powerful concentration I used to have as a kid
  
  
  • I want to be able to think deeply about a subject with patience and trust that the process will be fruitful


• Being Inspired/Motivated
  
  • I want the sense of wonderment to be powerful enough for me to accomplish things
  
  
  • I want the trust that I will have the time and energy to make something constructive from following my curiosity


• Deep Understanding
  
  • I want to understand more things that I am involved with from its constructive "first principles"
  
  
  • I want to be able to achieve this level of understanding in way that seems more volitional and predictable